THE GREATEST GRAMMAR ERROR OF ALL TIME

This needs no introduction.

Well, maybe a bit.

My dear friend Ryan was perusing JohnMcCain.com, for some odd reason, and came across the most delicious grammar error I’ve ever seen.

Oh, my God…

This is fantastic on SO many levels.

What’s most hilarious is that this is on McCain’s official Web site.  This isn’t a souvenir put together by an enthusiastic member of the GOP to make some extra cash.  This is official stuff.

I must ask…is our children learning yet?

Since Ryan sent this to me on Friday, McCain’s site has changed the pen to the proper grammar.  But if you don’t believe me, you can still see documentation of this hilarity here and here.

Lay vs. Lie and the Hanes Lie Flat Collar

I received quite the loaded question from reader Sara.

It turns out that Hanes is now selling a T-shirt with the brand name LAY FLAT COLLAR.

Well, now.

Does the collar lie? Or do we lay it down?

I think we’ve had this discussion on here before.

You use the word lay when someone places an object or puts it down.

Before you go to bed, please lay out your clothes for the next day.

You use the word lie when the subject reclines…

I lie in bed for a long time on Saturday mornings.

However, it starts getting complicated when you get into the past tense.

Here’s a brief overview:

If we’re talking about placing:

I lay my clothes out the night before.

I laid my clothes out last night.

I’ve laid my clothes out every night since I was eight years old.

If we’re talking about reclining:

I lie in bed for a long time on Saturday mornings.

I lay in bed for a long time last Saturday.

I’ve lain for 30 minutes so far.

Good times.

Anyway, Sara told me that Hanes shirt features a LAY FLAT COLLAR.

So, who lays the collar?  Does the collar lay itself?  In that case, it would lie, not lay.

I think that Hanes means that the shirt

I can see why Hanes wouldn’t be thrilled with the word lie.  In addition to most of the population confusing these two words, the word lie has a negative connotation.  That probably wouldn’t be the best way to sell undergarments.

Hanes, if you come across this entry, I hope you change your ways.  I doubt it, but I hope that you do.

I’m not counting on it.

Thanks, Sara.

Old Spice Redundancy

I’m watching TV and this Old Spice commercial just came on:

If you can’t watch video right now, this is a commercial for Old Spice Hair and Body wash — which, they say, is “for hair and/or body — or both.”

Isn’t “both” already contained in the “and/or”?

Just saying.

A nice glass of “ice tea”

You know, sometimes I think that I’ll never find another pet peeve.  Then I end up searching lowes.com for an ice maker (don’t ask).  While searching for ice makers, here is what popped up instead:

Ooh, I hate it when people call it ice tea.  It is not simply tea made of ice — it is tea that has had been iced and therefore iced tea.

At times, it seems like more people are saying ice tea than iced tea, at least up here in the northeast.  (I’m pretty sure that sweet tea is the term preferred in the southern and midwestern states.)

The fact that either Lowes or the manufacturers spelled this wrong only perpetuates this myth.

Have you noticed this?

Christmas Carroling

A few times a year, I buy a few rolls of unique wrapping paper. I always try to go for something unique and different, and when I found this purple Christmas wrapping paper at Target, I knew I had to get it!

It was perfect, and it fits my personality perfectly — it’s my favorite color, with shiny holograms, girly script, cute little doodles between the words….

AND A SIGNIFICANT SPELLING ERROR.

Christmas carroling.

NOOOOOOOOOO!

The wrapping paper would have been perfect without that error!

I considered correcting the errors, or getting rid of the paper altogether, but I decided to leave it as is.

Turns out it’s what’s inside that counts — especially when it’s a Chia Shrek!

(That’s my friend Beth in her best tacky Christmas attire. She loved it.)

Gifts for the Grammarian

I’m back! I’m back!

Sorry for the absence. I hope you’re all well.

I got a few grammar-oriented gifts for Christmas — which, to be honest, I wasn’t expecting at all!

First of all, my friend Lisa got me this magnet:

They have a whole line of products with this image, from shirts and tank tops to pins, stickers and bags. Check out the line here.

From my dad, I got the book Woe is I: The Grammarphobe’s Guide to Better English in Plain English:

I leafed through the book, and it has a lot of great topics for future posts. Buy it on Amazon here.

Stay tuned….

Over the Hill

My friend Andy’s aunt and uncle recently celebrated their fiftieth and sixtieth birthdays, respectively. Their children decorated their lawn with plenty of signs mocking their milestones. Check them out:

I don’t even know where to begin!

I honestly don’t know where to begin!

Luck of the Irish

Is that all there is?

Happy “Halfway to St. Paddy’s Day,” everyone! If you’re in Boston, there’s a big party at McFadden’s tomorrow night. I’ll either be there or down the street at the Hong Kong.

I’m wincing at the cleanup process already.

Ewwwwwww.

Glade Scented Oil Candles WHAT?!

I was watching TV with my roommates Omni and Jessica (who just moved in Wednesday!) tonight when I spotted some egregious grammar in an advertisement.

But first….this was my first experience watching The Hills. Ugh! First of all, the show is so fake that it’s painful to watch. More importantly, however, I cannot believe how Spencer proposed to Heidi! That was the most uncomfortable-to-watch, ingenuine, made-for-TV proposal that I have ever, ever seen. Ugh.

Anyway, a commercial came on for Glade Scented Candles. This is how the commercial ended:

Glade Scented Oil Candles
Quickly fills the whole room with fragrance

Oh, no.

It would be one thing if they said that Glade quickly fills the whole room with fragrance. The noun and verb would have matched, even if it didn’t make sense.

Why did they decide to do this? Quickly fills the whole room with fragrance is not the only Glade motto — in fact, it’s only the motto for Glade Scented Candles. (Check out the Glade site here.) Because of this, I can’t even imagine why they wrote fills instead of fill.

Fill makes more sense for two reasons:

1) It matches the noun

2) The statement could mean a command.

Come on, FILL the whole room with fragrance, why don’t you? Make the scent of your charmingly annoying ten-year-old son’s dirty gym socks nothing but a memory as you unleash the scent!

That, Glade, would make sense to me.

Because of your error, I doubt your credibility. That’s the truth.

Within the Mouths of Babes

In terms of my grammar vandalism, I mostly go after businesses, news organizations and institutions of higher education. In my mind, these are the people who can afford to hire a copy editor. If you can hire a graphic designer, an advertising consultant or a spokesperson, then you can afford to pay an editor a one-time fee to glance over your work and add an apostrophe or two.

I could do that! If you have a business and are wondering if you’re using correct grammar, email me!

Once again, I digress.

These pictures were sent to me by Donna, an NPR fan who heard my broadcast. Take a close look at this cereal box:

First of all, I think it’s a bit disturbing to see the ubiquitous Amazon.com arrow. I’ve bought plenty of things on Amazon, but perishable food? That’s kind of creepy.

Look at the green writing. Babies Perfect First Solid Food.

Not good….

I’m imagining a cheerleader reciting the line. “BABIES! PERFECT! FIRST SOLID FOOD!”

I wasn’t sure if the original intent was to make it say Baby’s Perfect First Solid Food or Babies’ Perfect First Solid Food.

Before long, however, Earth’s Best changed the cereal box:

It was supposed to be Baby’s Perfect First Solid Food all along.

Technically, that’s grammatically correct, if a bit awkward-sounding and ancient.

I’m not a fan of that kind of phrasing: Baby’s First Bite. Baby’s Favorite Toy. And Baby Makes Three. To me, it sounds like it’s straight out of the 1950s, where you would see Baby’s Best Shampoo next to Rover’s Favorite Dish. Still, you see it a lot, even today.

Now it’s time for a question for you. What is the worst error you’ve seen on packaging?

Thanks, Donna.

Image Source

Image Source

Within the Mouths of Babes

In terms of my grammar vandalism, I mostly go after businesses, news organizations and institutions of higher education. In my mind, these are the people who can afford to hire a copy editor. If you can hire a graphic designer, an advertising consultant or a spokesperson, then you can afford to pay an editor a one-time fee to glance over your work and add an apostrophe or two.

I could do that! If you have a business and are wondering if you’re using correct grammar, email me!

Once again, I digress.

These pictures were sent to me by Donna, an NPR fan who heard my broadcast. Take a close look at this cereal box:

First of all, I think it’s a bit disturbing to see the ubiquitous Amazon.com arrow. I’ve bought plenty of things on Amazon, but perishable food? That’s kind of creepy.

Look at the green writing. Babies Perfect First Solid Food.

Not good….

I’m imagining a cheerleader reciting the line. “BABIES! PERFECT! FIRST SOLID FOOD!”

I wasn’t sure if the original intent was to make it say Baby’s Perfect First Solid Food or Babies’ Perfect First Solid Food.

Before long, however, Earth’s Best changed the cereal box:

It was supposed to be Baby’s Perfect First Solid Food all along.

Technically, that’s grammatically correct, if a bit awkward-sounding and ancient.

I’m not a fan of that kind of phrasing: Baby’s First Bite. Baby’s Favorite Toy. And Baby Makes Three. To me, it sounds like it’s straight out of the 1950s, where you would see Baby’s Best Shampoo next to Rover’s Favorite Dish. Still, you see it a lot, even today.

Now it’s time for a question for you. What is the worst error you’ve seen on packaging?

Thanks, Donna.

Image Source

Image Source